Bimwe mubiranga urugo rwiza, ni urukundo, kwihangana, kubabarira. Hari abavuga ko kubaka urugo atari umunezero ahubwo ari ukugirango umuntu atungane abe uwera. "We do not marry to be happy but to be holy".
Kubera ko kwihanganirana mu rugo kw’abubakanye bikenewe cyane, mbere yo gushaka ni uguhitamo umuntu ufite ibintu bike bizagusaba kumwihanganira. Hari bimwe umuntu yatangaho ingero, ariko bigenda bitandukana bitewe n’imyumvire ndetse n’imiterere ya buri muntu ariko muri rusange umuntu yakwirinda gushaka umukobwa/umuhungo ufite ibintu byinshi bibatandukanya atazihanganira.
Dore bimwe mu bintu bijya bitera ibibazo ubishoboye wakwirinda nkuko tubikesha inyandiko ya Pastor Jean Gakwaya :
Gushaka umuntu ukurusha imyaka myinshi
Iyo akurusha imyaka myinshi agera mu za bukuru akaba umusaza cyangwa umukecuru wowe ukiri muto bikaba byabakururira ibibazo mu rugo.
Gushakana n’ufite abandi bana
Iyo mutabanje ngo mu byumvikaneho mbere, havuka ikibazo cyo gukunda no kurera uwo mwana kimwe n’abanyu ndetse rimwe ma rimwe uwo mwabyaranye ntimutandukana burundu bigatuma habaho guhemukira uwo mwashakanye.
Gushaka uwaryamanye n’abandi benshi
Nubwo bitoroshye kumenya ko umugabo waryamanye n’abandi ariko iyo yaryamanye n’abakobwa benshi akiri umusore hari igihe bigira ingaruka mu rugo.
Ku bakobwa kubera ko bishobora kugaragara ku mubiri, hari abagabo babyitwaza bagahoza abagore babo ku nkeke, bakabafuhira by’ikirenga iyo bamenye ko baryamanaga n’abandi mbere yo gushaka.
Abashakana barushanya amashuri bikabije
Hari igihe bitera ubwimvikane buke bitewe nuko umwe ashobora kuba akunda ikintu kuko azi kugikoresha undi akaba atazi n’icyo kimaze. Urugero niba uwize akunda mudasobwa (computer) utarize biramubabaza
Abashakana badahuje ubwoko n’imico
Aha ubwoko tuvuze ni kubadahuje imico bitewe n’ibihugu ndetse n’ubwoko bw’uruhu nko ku bazungu, abirabura, abahinde, abashinwa n’abandi. Hari igihe bigira ingaruka ku bana nko mu gihe ushatse umwirabura kandi uri umuzungu umwana mubyaranye agera mu birabura ngo ni umzungu, yagera mu bazungu ngo ni umwirabura.
Ubwumvikane buke mu miryango mukomokamo
Iyo imiryango muvukamo itumvikana bishobora kubatera ubwumvikane buke mu rugo rwanyu.
Umwe ari umukene cyane undi nawe ari umukire cyane
Hari igihe haba ibibazo bishingiye ku butunzi bwo mu miryango. Agasuzuguro, ubwibone cyangwa se kubura agaciro kuko ntacyo winjiza mu muryango.
Kuba mu madini atandukanye
Bishobora kubateza ubwumvikane bucye bwaho mushobora kujya gusengera .
Hari n’ibindi byinshi abagiye kurushinga bashobora kudahuza, umuntu atarondora aha ngo abirangize. Mu gihe waba wiyemeje kurushinga n’umukobwa cyangwa umuhungu mufite ibintu byinshi bibatandukanya ni byiza ko ubanza ukabimenya mukabiganiraho mbere yo gushakana ukanitegura kuzihangana bidasanzwe.
Zimwe mu nama wakurikiza igihe wahuye n’ibibazo bigoye kwihanganira mu rushako:
– Kubimenya no gusobanukirwa neza ingaruka ibibatandukanya bishobora kugira mu rugo rwanyu kugirango ntuzatungurwe ngo uhungabane utagishoboye gusubira inyuma.
– Kubiganiraho n’uwo mugiye kurushinga
– Kubyakira kandi mwiteguye kwakira n’ingaruka bishobora kubagiraho
– Kumvikana umurongo muzagenderaho
– Kwiyemeza kuzabyihanganira
– Gukumira ikintu cyose gishobora kuririra kuri ibyo mudahuza
– Kutumva amabwire y’abantu
– Kwihanganira ingaruka zose zakomoka kubyo mudahuje
– Ubugwaneza no kwirinda agahinda mugihe bitangiye kukuvuna