Muri iyi minsi hagaragara ingo nyinshi zifite ibibazo ndetse bivugwa ko umubare w’ingo zisenyuka ugenda wiyongera. Rimwe mu ipfundo rero ry’ibyo bibazo biba mu ngo ni imibonano mpuzabitsina itanyura abashakanye. Ibyo twabibwiwe na Madame Nora, ukunze kugira inama abashakanye kubijyanye n’ubuzima bw’umuryango muri rusange ndetse n’ubuzima bw’imibonano mpuzabitsina by’umwihariko.
Nkuko yabitubwiye, hari abantu batamenya ko bafite ubuzima bubi bujyanye n’imibonano mpuzabitsina bakazabana nabyo bikaba byazavamo ibindi bibazo bikomeye.
Dore bimwe mu biranga ingo zifite ikibazo mu buzima bw’ imibonano mpuzabitsina hagati y’abashakanye :
– Niba inshuro nyinshi utaryoherwa igihe ukoze imibonano n’uwo mwashakanye ukabona ntacyo wabikoraho ndetse ukumva udashoboye kubivuga, yaba ari ukubibwira uwo mwashakanye cyangwa kugisha inama ababishoboye ufite ikibazo.
– Niba inshuro nyinshi ari izo ukora imibonano mpuzabitsina n’uwo mwashakanye utabishaka, uyikora gusa mu rwego rwo kuzuza inshingano z’abashakanye ufite ikibazo dore ko uwo mwashakanye abimenya bigatuma nawe atayishimira, mufite ikibazo.
– Niba iyo ukoze imibonano mpuzabitsina ubabara hari ikibazo.
– Niba iyo ukoze imibonano mpuzabitsina utababara ariko ukumva mu mutima utabyishimiye ndetse ukaba wakwifuza ko bitaba hari ikibazo .
– Niba ukora imibonano kugira ngo wikize umusonga (ibi bikorwa akenshi n’abagabo) atari uko ubyishimiye mu mutima ni ikibazo .
– Niba hashira iminsi myinshi, ibyumweru cyangwa amezi mudakora imibonano mpuzabitsina ku mpamvu iyariyo yose ni ikibazo.
– Niba ukora imibonano mpuzabitsina udashishikajwe no kunezeza uwo mwashakanye ahubwo ari kubw’inyungu zawe gusa ( kuryoherwa kwawe) ni ikibazo.
– Amagambo yo kujombana atagaragaza ikibazo ariko kandi yerekana ko umuntu atishimye urugero : « aba se ko aribo batuyobora, nta jambo nkigira muri uru rugo » , « ubu ntakabaraga umuntu akigira » « ntamugongo nkigira » nabyo byerekana ko hari ikibazo.
Ibi bibazo bishobora guterwa n’impamvu nyinshi ariko akenshi bituruka ku myumvire itariyo ndetse n’ubumenyi buke ku bijyanye n’ubuzima bw’imibonano mpuzabitsina aho akenshi abantu bagera aho bubaka ingo batarigeze babiganirizwa mu miryango yabo ( manque d’éducation sexuelle ) ndetse ibyo bigatuma abantu batabiha agaciro gakwiriye, ntibabyiteho igihe cyose bari mu rushako.
Niba ibyo tuvuze haruguru bigaragara mu mibonano mpuzabitsina mu rugo rwawe birakwereka ko mufite ikibazo gikomeye mugomba gukemura byihutirwa. Iyo ubuzima bw’imibonano mpuzabitsina butameze neza ntabwo bishoboka ko abashakanye bagira guhuza cyangwa se ngo biyumvanemo, bityo n’urukundo rukahagirira ibibazo.
Mu by’ukuri imibonano mpuzabitsina y’abashakanye myiza irangwa no kuba abayikora banyurwa ku mubiri ndetse no ku mutima kandi bose bakaba bayishimira 100% (satisfaction sexuelle) nta n’umwe wumva aviramo aho.
Byatanzwe na Madame Nora, ugira inama abashakanye
